Welcome to the Tails of the Dumbarse Dog - the blog where her adventures are documented.

For further adventures, feel free to check out her Twitter feed and her Facebook page.

Monday, December 3, 2012

Wait... I'm not in charge around here?

Miss I loves playing outside.
Dumbarse Dog is always outside.
Miss I is difficult at the best of times.
Combine the two, and I need to go outside, call Dumbarse Dog over (she ignores me), and make her sit so Miss I can play without being chewed on, barked at, or rounded up.

Take today for an example. Miss I was a wonderful child this afternoon (I bribed her. I told her that if she was good, and helpful, she could help me cook some cakes, dinner, etc. Turns out she doesn't think of cooking as a chore, but something to be enjoyed.)
So, while I was doing a few other things and she was waiting for me, she went outside for a minute in her (sheepskin) slippers. Dumbarse Dog decided to chew on said slippers. Miss I was still wearing said slippers.
I walk outside, tell Miss I to smack Dumbarse Dog on the backside. Dumbarse Dog decided that was an invitation to chew on Miss I's arm, hand, legs.... and still the slippers.
So, as The Boss, I step in.
"Dumbarse Dog! Stop! Heel." I growl.
*Dumbarse Dog ignores me and continues chewing on Miss I*
*I walk over to Dumbarse Dog and smack her hindquarters*
"No! Sit!" I growl again.
Dumbarse Dog walks onto the grass and growls and barks at me.
"No! Sit! Down!" I growl again.
Dumbarse Dog finally sits, and we all walk inside, making sure she knows that she's now in trouble.